Letting Go of Control
I always thought I had some sort of control over most aspects of my life. I tried to think out every possibility and figure out a solution just to be sure I was completely prepared. I thought this was working for me, and I was happy living in my little bubble of control. I started to pray about doing more in my branch and church. I thought maybe I would teach a few Ladies' Circle and MBA classes. I didn’t want to do anything too wild because I needed to maintain control. Of course, that didn't go as planned.
It’s funny; when you start asking God to give you things to do, He automatically pushes you out of your comfort zone! About a month into me praying about doing more, I was asked to be the assistant camp director for Southwest Area MBA (SWAMBA) Campout for 2018. And that meant I would be the camp director for 2019. It was a huge responsibility, and I know how much this campout means to everyone. I’m not a very good public speaker and it was something that I thought wasn’t meant for me to do. I was beyond nervous, but I felt God’s Spirit, and I knew He wanted me to do this.
The 2018 SWAMBA Campout came and went, and it was such an awesome experience. Now, it was time to start planning the next year's campout. The first task I was given was to figure out the theme. I had a few months to pray about it, so I started to pray and fast. Nothing really came to me right away, but I knew I had some time to come up with something. I handled this as a work project and relied on my own instincts. A month passed, and I had a list of verses but none I felt a real connection with. I kept going around and around in circles, and it wasn’t going anywhere.
I got frustrated and felt lost about not being able to settle on a theme. I finally took a step back and cleared my thoughts. I realized that I was trying so hard to maintain control and force it that I lost sight of what’s important. This was for the honor and glory of God and the message God wanted. I let myself get in the way of God’s plan, and I needed to let go of control. I prayed for guidance and peace of mind. Right after that, I felt like God just lifted it off of me.
When I started to let go of control, everything started falling together. A few days before the conference call when I was supposed to tell everyone the theme, I was reading a book, and there was a verse, and it stuck out to me. It was Isaiah 64:8, “But now, O Lord, thou art our father; we are the clay, and thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand.” It stopped me dead in my tracks, and I knew that this was special. I knew that this is what I wanted to share with everyone.
When I said that verse, everyone on the conference call felt the Spirit, and we knew this was the one. After we got off the call, I cried and thanked God. After months of feeling frustrated, the answer was so simple. Let go and let God.
Everything fell together. I was amazed by how God worked all weekend at the camp. I have never felt God’s power in that way my whole life. When I am feeling overwhelmed or confused about what to do, I always think back to that experience and remind myself — let it go and let God.
This article has undergone ministry review and approval.